June 27th, 2012

Rachel: "Every time I'm on Twitter I say to myself 'Oh Lauren and Matthew Lewis must be watching soccer...."


Lauren: "Did I just use the scientific method to flirt with somebody? Yes, yes I did."

June 18th, 2012

*Lady awkwardly nuzzling the back of some guy's neck downtown.*
Rachel: "Looks like she's eating him..Should I yell 'Bath salts!' and run away?"


Rachel: "It's just I'm just saying is all..."
Lauren: "What does that even mean?"


Rachel: "Lauren, you said you were going to stop doing that. We high fived..."
Lauren: "Yeah, like 20 mins ago.."
Rachel: "But we high fived."


 Rachel: "I was going to offer to call, but since you're awkward on the phone you get to call."


Lauren: "It's going to be insane because you, me, and Megan are all single this year."
Rachel: "Yeah, it will be like the desperate apartment-wives of Westpoint."


Rachel: "I'm going to get you to get a piercing, even if it means tranquilizing you."


Lauren: "So I was in the middle of my story and she just interrupts and says 'Look, my elbow is burnt.' who does that?"
Rachel: I would've said 'I'm sorry about your elbow but here's my fist in your face.'"

June 2nd, 2012

Rachel: Boys are dumb.
Lauren: They better figure their shit out soon or else we're destined to live together forever and the universe will surely implode.
Rachel: That is the damn truth.

Lauren: Damn, it feels good to be a gangster.
Rachel: Yeah, you definitely have to know how to watch your back in these suburban child watch communities of ours.